Practice mindfulness outside of sex.
Start small…. Short practices such as ‘the three minute breathing space’ is a great start.
Practice informal mindfulness practices like while in the shower …noticing what you can feel, smell, taste, hear around you.
Practice mindfulness lying down with a mindfulness practice called ‘the body scan’
Practice mindful self compassion practices such as ‘the self compassion break’ by Kristen Neff. Bring all these short practices to mindful self focus – focusing on the breath, moving awareness to the whole body, specific parts of the body, noticing thoughts and bringing awareness back again and again. Can do on own or with a sex toy.
If you have experienced trauma may not feel safe to close eyes and bring attention into the body and mindfulness might bring up distress…. Don’t judge yourself for this. It’s common for people who have experienced trauma to find mindfulness challenging initially. I would recommend having support from a trained mental health professional with experience of working with trauma and body based approaches.